Hindsight is a wonderful thing. As we relive our dates in the hours or days that follow we start to identify things that we shouldn’t have said, or should have done, and if there is no follow-up date we use these regrets to explain the reason for this. The best way to stop this self-accusation is not to have regrets and in the case of a date, this isn’t really as difficult as it may at first appear.
One of the most common regrets is in not being yourself on the date. Most people spend so long getting themselves ready for their date and making sure that everything looks “perfect” that they forget to find the real person behind the fancy clothes and micro-grooming. Your date usually doesn’t know this “perfect” image anymore than you know the “perfect” image that they are showing off and so what should be two friends enjoying themselves becomes an awkward verbal dance of strangers not knowing what to say. Dress up for your date, but make sure that your real self remains visible. Don’t regret afterwards that your date never had a chance to see the real you.
There are things that experts say you should never discuss on a date, especially a first date, politics and religion being just two of them. There are other things however which can be touchy subjects and until you know what kind of opinion your date is likely to have on them, if they are things that you are very opinionated about, it’s best to keep your passion on these subjects hidden until a time when you’re more sure about what your date will think about the opinions you have.
In a long-term relationship for example, your opinions ought to be respected by your partner whether they agree or not, but at the preliminary stages of the dating stage, don’t let your opinions run away with the conversation and turning a fun date into a serious debate that you later regret.
Intimacy on a date is an especially tricky situation. The rule here is to go with what makes you comfortable. If your partner is tactile and you don’t like it, explain gently that you’re not comfortable. Don’t make a big thing about his making a pass at you. If your date is implying that they would like more than a kiss at the end of the evening, go with what makes you comfortable. Don’t later regret at a later time that you shouldn’t have done what you did, or that you didn’t do something that you wanted to.
If you have a great date, you don’t think that you did anything that you’re not happy with, and yet your date still doesn’t return your calls or ask you out again, don’t regret anything that you did — chances are that doing things differently would have had the same result anyway. Instead accept that sometimes things don’t work out for no specific reason and then find a more worthy person to date!
Jane Saeman runs a membership site which provides thirty articles each month in the ever growing and profitable niche of Dating and Relationships. Find out how you can profit from this huge industry at my website which is at http://www.DatingNicheArticles.com
Latest posts by (see all)
- Get assignment expert here for all assignment solutions - December 2, 2017
- Secret Strategies That Generate Outstanding Business Leads! - December 2, 2017
- Your Next Should Be Destination-Nepal Trekking in October - August 19, 2017